I Think I'm Back

If you're new here, you may not know that I do this. This blog changed my life. It gave me the opportunity to express myself when I needed it most. I'm a better person today because of it. I need this... terribly. I once defined myself as a writer and I've unfortunately gotten away from that. I'm talking too much though. So I'll get back into the swing of things with what I wrote for my performance at the last Grip The Mic, which happens to be the really dope event that I host. My life's pretty cool now. Love you for reading. Thank you so much.

An hour and a half until Grip The Mic, so I should start this verse. And I’m not sure who’s in the crowd, so I’ll try not to curse. Way more prophetic than profane, it’s so strange. All I know is this performance will be memorable. I told myself that I would go from pitiful to pivotal. 

Now look at me... I’m not quite there but I’m on the way. If you knew me two years ago you’d be so proud of Shaun today. 

And that’s not wrong to say, I put my talents on display. I couldn’t have it gone to waste. Don’t find a balance? Bonds’ll break. That’s chemistry bars, I tend to do that periodically. I’m just tryna set the table, food for thought we all can eat. Iridescent inventory, showing what’s in store for me. God’s light is my aura, ain’t no neon guts. I keep an uzi on my side that they ain’t see Shaun tuck. That’s lyrical artillery. You didn’t know? Well now you do, no better feeling in the world than mom saying “I’m proud of you.” 

I’m probably caught up on a tangent and rambling. Only an hour til the show it’s probably clear that I’m scrambling. But yet I’m rarely outta pocket, still it’s clear I need a topic. My mind just keeps on racing, might need therapy to stop it. Yet this is therapeutic. Should put my head in music. It’s like I know I have a gift but I just never use it. Falling behind but tryna keep up the pace, and every line is good dope, like the trees you can taste. I seem to embrace, the fact I’ve made egregious mistakes. But I don’t look at them as pages that I need to erase because I’d rather look to God like thanks for keeping me safe. And there’s a few in the crowd with a slight gleam on their face and maybe someone wondering how long he’s gonna take but by the end of this performance even he’d be amazed. 

It’s 5:38 and I’m just getting started. Rhymes that I paint, make you picture me as an artist cause my lyrics be the hardest I ain’t even gotta pause it. And the pen gives me withdrawals but I still keep making deposits. And how I used to have a Benz but now I pull up in a Mazda. Or how I come home from work and think “I’m looking like my father” could continue with that scheme but I’m not even gonna bother. 

Cause my mind’s too fast for the pen. It’s been three months since the blindside crash to the Benz. Totaled, a sum of parts. I’m hoping you love my art. Every time I write a verse it’s like throwing a puzzled dart. I’m tryna put the pieces together and keep my aim straight. Crazy how I put my mind to it, then I became great. I can paint a picture, like cheese. And my vision, high beams. Excuse my language but there ain’t too many niggas like me. I switched up my scene, I’m on my way to living my dreams. I’m really feeling like a king because I live with my queen. Damn. 

You make me want to write verses. Every moment’s invaluable, you make life worth it. I paint a picture and it’s quite perfect. Pick up the pen and find the right verbiage. The flow is clean I rarely write curses.

Propane no profane, 

it’s dope as cocaine. It’s kinda coming off the top, I need a dose of Rogaine. 

I’m playing no games, fly as the Soul Plane. 

Lyrical artillery, this chopper won’t aim.

That’s blind precision. My test? To define a vision. I’m blessed with divine depiction. Invested, my time is tension. 

This.. passion’s impatient. 

I’ve always had it. 

I’m.. destined for greatness 

Like I’m RJ Barrett.

I parlay parrots, repeat myself. I hardly have it, seeking wealth. I’m just tryna tell my story, listen up I need your help. The plan of action is to be myself. I got tired of wondering how people felt.

In these 98’s I’m kinda great. Hoping I can concentrate. Quit my job at Dominos and now I’m boutta dominate. Worked on my delivery. Metaphors and similes. People threw me in the trash while knowing what they meant to me. And that just don’t make sense to me. Friends can turn to enemies. Then you make like salty fans and burn up all the memories. Setting jersey on Fire, word to Chief Keef. Every verse I debriefed. These words they be like 3 deep. That’s half dead, a triple entendre. Spitting for sponsors. I’m right cause nothing written is wrong. This vision of Shaun. Reminds me of this mission I’m on. I’m free writing and scrambling so pardon all this rambling. Paint a picture like Nateil when the camera flicks. DinahLee inspired me to throw a couple lines in this. These rhymes can approach you. An oxymoron, awkwardly social. The shine can expose you, I’m the host but I’m still tryna promote you. Really I’m just writing words, teach you something as I’m cooking up this dope, Heisenberg. Scribbling, I don’t have much of a plan. I’m just thanking God that Mona made it back from Sudan. Food for thought these raps in a can. And every verse is validated by the claps of a fan. 

I’m merging verses in, catch the flow and surf or swim, peep how I disperse the pen, every one’s a perfect 10. Call it calisthenics, I flip these words for the exercise. Poetically plotting to get these idioms incentivized. Sweating, summer’s salt. Gymnastics, what’s he next to try? Word to Designer glasses, they can’t see that I special-ize. Guess that takes special eyes. I’m such a special guy. I know cause those who understand don’t ever question why. A diamond in the rough that’s about to bust like a pressured pipe. That might be a triple entendre, I hope I said it right. Cause that’s the type of line that you’ve gotta see, cellulite. FP&L, this next one is swell. I wonder how far I go now that I fell in this well. Made a wish, and did it right Shaun, damn you’re pretty bright Shaun. Now they’ll start to get the idea, you cut the lights on. Cellulite, to sell ya light? I guess I was bred to write. I’ma get some bread to write. Shit went left, I’m dead to rights. Tryna clear my head tonight. My train of thought is a runaway, the Taking of Pelham. These stories wish I had the focus that it takes me to tell em. I’m getting off track. That’s just where my thoughts at. Need to focus on my calling, sorry I ain’t call back. I’ve probably been a bad friend. I’m sorry it just happened. And I can’t even promise you that’s only in the past tense. Life feels fast forwarded. I feel mad fortunate. The Price is Write, I’ma get a bag just to afford the shit. Lyrical performances, recording from the coordinates. I map it out, then rap about them sleeping on me, pass it out. Distribute diction, it’s even true as fiction. Dot your eyes across my tees, crucifixion.

My newest mission, so thanks if you choose to listen. If you’re reading this, this is something for you to mention. 

Kill the game, myself and I are the two defendants. We’re on trial from the moment They See Us. They boast the egregious, then turn around promote them the leaders and don’t keep it secret. They say it’s fair and we’re supposed to believe it. Who wrote the agreement, that said that we get most of the freedom? 

It’s time to take it all back. Read this line in all caps. They say you’re innocent til you’re guilty, but it’s all cap. 

Born into guilt they refuse to carry. Opportunities Miss, like she refused to marry. Truth is scary.