Happy Belated Wordplay

Told you I was writing them repentantly. Lyrical artillery, I'm crying in my infantry. My heart is on my sleeve, my mind is on the memories. Finally starting to see that you're not trying to remember me. What did I do to make you want to forget? Cause to me it seems I always gave you love and respect. One of few people I thought that I could trust in this test. And now our line of communication doesn't connect. I've got a lot on my mind, it's about to come off my chest. When I'd seem even a little hurt, you would be jumping to check. Now you don't send me nothing, a text. (This next line may make my mother upset) How could you abandon me when I was fucking depressed? Tears would fall when I'd succumb to the stress. So much pressure it felt like I was punched in the chest. Being hurt by people I want to protect. I was telling new women that I'm in love with my ex. And telling strangers that I didn't feel the love from my friends. While battling a depression I just wanted to end. But in that time, look at what I've done with the pen. And now look at this, I've done it again. Grab the beat, and punch it again. Swaggyspeaks, he doesn't pretend. It isn't done til it ends.

I can talk about anything when I write, you never know. I was missing on January 9th, Derrick Rose. I knew that day was special, but I tried to ignore it. And because of that, I missed something mighty important. Happy belated to Shamel, he's way more than a cousin. I've been distracted by people who change up but he doesn't. As soon as it hit me I called and apologized. Overwhelmed by epiphanies so often I start to cry. I've gotta face it, that is something I can not deny. I'm just such an honest guy.
So sometimes it's kinda sad when I write. I can't front, I want you back in my life. We can't seem to get the capacity right. You feel pushed away by this passion of mine. Cause when I get defensive I start attacking in lines. That's something that I don't have to deny, because to not see it I'd have to be blind. But in the moment I just rap and I rhyme, and tell a story that is actually mine. Our friendship's taken a tragic decline. I've been feeling like I'm back in a bind, but I don't think that I'm imagining signs. I just follow my heart on a quest to master my mind. Too often I reflect upon the past and rewind, because it's always on the back of my mind. Now every rap is refined. I gave a rib and now I'm back in my prime. Bury the hatchet and blow up, this masterpiece mine. This is the last of these lines.

10 toes down, I seem to outstand. Tim Halpert, spitting heat without fans. And I be talking too much when I think about Pam. And Pam could be you, or Pam could be her. Or Pam could be no one, Pam could be words. That's for God to know, and me to figure out. To Whom It May Concern, I hope I'm reaching you right now. Cause this is the only way that I can speak to you right now. It still doesn't feel like I can even tweet to you right now. But you're on my mind so much I even think of you out loud. I just want to say I'm sorry for my part in this. It may get kinda gory my heart's in it. Don't know the end to the story, I miss the start of it. That sounded better when I thought of it. This letter's getting lost a bit. Built a friendship way too strong to settle for the opposite.

Buried alive in this lyrical coffin, I've got sick rhymes. I'm about to finish The Office for the sixth time. Reminiscent reflection on when I started this time. Transplant transparency, I put my heart in this rhyme. From the bottom of my heart, this is top of the line. I would change it all back at the drop of a dime. That's something that's so uncommon to find. Now I've finished The Office, some people I've been missing since August. Weight on my chest, the shit was enormous. I couldn't ignore it. I'd like to send my thanks to any supporters. I was searching for my sanity, I really just lost it. Retrieving it was really important. I've been writing this for two days, I could've just forced it. I was dying to win a battle that I could've just forfeit. I was so broken that I couldn't afford it. I was trying to numb a pain that I once didn't acknowledge. It was running through my brain so much the pen was exhausted. I left my job trying to better my fortunes, I made a bet and I lost it. Look how much depression has cost him. It knocked me off of my path, time to get off of my ass. Last semester it cost me a class. Cause life was testing me and that was even harder to pass. Caused me to part with my past to the point where my heart had been smashed. I'm broker than broke, it cost me my cash. But I'm defeating the demons, toss em all in the trash. Lyrical artillery, I keep it all in my bag.
I need to receive an incentive for what I illustrate. I think I may have turned my depression into my demo tape. I was at my low point, I'm about to elevate. I got through my worst hours by focusing on my better days. Back on a level where I levitate. Made it through the pressure and kept my head on straight. I'm about to come into some dollars but I'll never change. I'm plotting on the social media lottery. I've been broke, it's been hard for me. Spilling this heart in me with pressure clogging up my arteries. All the stress was rough. I'm blessed, what's luck? Friday the 13th, my defense is love.



                                                    -Swaggy T