Friday, April 1, 2016

Victor or Victim

I had quite an interesting month of March to say the least. Jam packed with ups & downs. Situations some would envy, circumstances some would pity. I started the month off by having the tire of my old car slashed by an angry stranger in the parking lot at work, and ended the month having my new car tampered with by a disgruntled former associate, in the very same parking lot. Funny how things come full circle that way. But I'm getting way ahead of myself here so I'll backtrack. At the start of the month I found myself in a new situation with what I guess you could call a special friend. Things were great. As the month went on, things got progressively worse and it was a strain on me as I watched my friend turn into a completely different person and the situation grew incredibly toxic. Our friendship suffered because there wasn't much to hold onto, I simply couldn't do it anymore. It sucked, because the person I started the month with was completely gone, so it felt like I'd lost a very close friend. By the end of the month all contact was cut off.
At the start of the month I found myself in a familiar situation with a car I'd grown tired of. No pun intended. I upset a lady in the parking lot on my way to work by taking the parking spot that rightfully belonged to me. A day later while driving home I realized that my tire was flat. She cut it. I had to come out of pocket with money that I'd been saving for a new car to buy a new tire for the car I was tired of. That was incredibly frustrating. Shortly after, my situation turned around. I got a new car and immediately made an Instagram appearance. Things were going well. I spent all of the money in my account on it but I wasn't worried because I was planning to sell my old car at CarMax and immediately recover financially, which worked out perfectly because I had a trip planned right after. Didn't work out that way. CarMax gave me an offer so low I refused to accept it. So suddenly I was an hour away from leaving for the weekend and found myself flat broke. Few feelings are worse than being broke when you thought you'd have money. Come to think of it, this might be better explained by this unfinished blurb that's sitting in my notepad. "I'm in that Benz with the paper tag. That ain't to flex, man I hate to brag. It's just in the process in which I state the facts of how I bought a Benz and now I can't pay for gas. Saved up first to see how long my paper lasts. Thinking I'ma sell the Jetta and just make it back. Took it to CarMax, they dam near told me take it back. Now I need money from my pops, but I hate to ask. Cause I feel I regress a bit every time I say "Thank You Dad" Chloe said I'll spot you, don't worry just pay me back. Somehow I've been reduced to handouts, how insane is that?" So here we are, the last weekend of the month and I've had my fair share of highs and lows. That ended up being one of the roughest weekends in recent memory for me but I kept it to myself. I took an L that it felt like I'd never recover from. A lifelong loss. I felt like I'd lost my best friends. After escaping that low feeling, on the last day of the month I walked out of work to see that my car had been messed with. An apparently fitting end to what seems on the surface to be a very trying month.
But that's the beauty of it, it wasn't a difficult month. Didn't feel that way at all. I was in high spirits all month for the most part. In retrospect, March was a fantastic month for me. What I've learned recently is that many times you can't control what happens to you, but you have full control over how you react to it and the effect it has on you. At the end of the day, negativity is a choice. I've learned to find positives in every situation, and that's helped me navigate life's twists and turns. If you're on the highway and it starts raining, do you pull over and complain about the weather or do you figure it out and get to your destination? Do what you have to do to get out of the rain, it's that simple. You may find it strange that I only spoke on the low points of March in this post. Well the way I see it, the blog is sort of a learning experience. I learn from everything I write, and I hope people learn things by reading. A wise man once said "Was taught to be a winner but I learned more from my losses" - Fab
Some amazing things happened for me in the month of March but they'll reveal themselves in due time. Those positives are what I focus on, and they make my losses seem minuscule and irrelevant. We all take L's. It's a part of life. But positivity is always an option. Chase heaven or wait for hell to find you. Defy your L's, don't let your L's define you. My friend Jalen inspired this post because we were discussing circumstances and he said "No matter what, we're always given a choice. You can either conquer your problems or be overcome by them. You can be a victor or a victim." I won't ever forget that and I hope anyone reading this won't either. Losses end games, losses end streaks, they even end seasons. But losses don't end careers. No matter how many losses you take you can come back and try to win until YOU decide to give up. No one has ever been forced to retire because of a loss. The Lakers have lost 60 games and Kobe is only retiring because he wants to. You don't get to the end without taking a few losses along the way. There are two L's in Finally. Don't be a victim. I have a philosophy that I've lived by as of late where I do my best to make sure I don't let the same thing ruin my day two days in a row. I don't pull over and sit in the rain. Win or lose, victors cruise.

#GetOutOfTheRain2016

                                                                             -Swaggy T

No comments:

Post a Comment